Self-medicating in my PJs

I started writing this yesterday (Saturday) at quarter past three in the afternoon in my time zone. I was still in my PJs having had a lie in in the morning and having done very little with my day (unlike me – or at least unlike the old me 😝). My son made me breakfast at lunchtime and then I spent my time reading posts by other bloggers and drinking wine. I probably should have been more motivated and up and doing stuff – especially as it’s getting closer to Christmas and I have plenty to organise. But there I was lying on the couch writing this post (and not even finishing it). (In my defence I was feeling a bit under the weather with this cough/cold that’s not quite shifted over the last few weeks.)

So this one is a bit of a confession really. Over the last few years I’ve gradually been drinking more and more alcohol. I used to drink only occasionally. Maybe that’s partly because when I was younger alcohol was a luxury I couldn’t really afford. I was also responsible for looking after children more often than not so I always tried to be sensible about my intake. When I started teaching I could afford to drink more and I did (stress of the job maybe?) ‘cause everybody did – not usually on a school night though. Since I started really battling with depression I’ve noticed that I’m drinking sometimes to take the edge off my feelings and recently I got to a point where I was drinking almost every night. It scared me a little bit because I don’t want to become dependent on it so I’ve made a conscious effort recently to have at least a few dry days every week.

It’s Sunday now and I’m at it again. My day has been more productive though. I went to church this morning (first time in a few weeks as it happens) and I’ve made a good start on the Christmas decorations (early for me but I felt like I needed some fairy lights). The Christmas tunes are on and I’m feeling a lot more positive today.

The thing is I know I’m not alone. I know lots of my friends are drinking more than they ever did too. Maybe it’s a coping mechanism? Maybe it’s just more socially acceptable to drink with every meal or even without a meal? Maybe it is simply that alcohol is more affordable when you don’t have nappies to buy? I’m also aware that it affects me more while I’m on the anti-depressants so I probably should really be drinking less.

Anyway, I’d like to hear your thoughts. Do you drink more or less than you used to? Do you think it’s an issue? Is it a bigger issue in society in general than it was in the past? Do we need to do something about it?

12 thoughts on “Self-medicating in my PJs

  1. Some call alcohol the “Christian drug” because it is legal and perfectly acceptable (I mean, there WAS wine at the Last Supper!). I did my share of drinking – a lot and 6 days a week – when I was first legal. Over the years, drinking often makes me have an upset stomach and I realized it wasn’t worth it. On special occasions, I will have a drink as a celebration, but that’s it. Actually, if it did medicate me, that feeling was short-lived. I’m glad you’re feeling concerned about yourself and trust that you know what is best for you – and will do it! Good luck!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I drink way less than I used to. I only drink when I go out to dinner or brunch on the weekends, and I limit it to two drinks. I do think alcohol has become overly prevalent, but I don’t know what to do

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  3. I think any habit undertaken to avoid life and feeling needs monitoring. If it’s constant and increasing, without restraint, it’s probably a problem.

    I don’t drink, but I keep myself tired and distracted in order to numb.

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  4. I have to admit that you are a very brave lady in terms of sharing with us your post and thoughts.
    I myself started drinking in my early teens and was dependent by the time I was in my 20s.
    I think that today alcohol has become more readily available and affordable in terms of the offers that are on. 2 for 20 pounds on beers and lagers and spirits regularly on offer and discounts on wines etc. The alcohol itself is a lot stronger than it used to be and licensing laws mean that you can get it at any hour.
    I myself stopped drinking in 1997 but I understand how difficult it is to give up.
    People who drink at home often don’t know how much they drink and units people don’t really understand.
    I know that there are a lot of resources available for people to learn about alcohol moderation without going down the route of AA.
    I know that I used to drink more when I felt depressed, socialising during and after work but in reality alcohol is a great way to celebrate, commiserate, suppress feelings and emotions and just generally is suitable for any reason.
    If you are concerned about the level of your drinking then I would speak with your Doctor.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks for sharing. I’m managing to have several dry days a week now and I’m not feeling as depressed right now so hopefully I’ll not need to go to the docs. I am very aware of the dangers though and I’m monitoring my intake and keeping myself in check. 🙂


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